Sibbo wrote:I like Ken but definitely bring the wood nymphs !
I just read this thread, so I'm a little late chiming in about the Wood Nymphs.
I'm sorry to say that nobody 'brings' the wood nymphs. They just go where they choose to go. I'd like to give you some hope that they might choose to attend the Oz rally, but the chances of that happening are approximately Zero. You see, the Wood Nymphs are both homebodies and reclusive. You could pitch a tent within a hundred yards of their dwelling and never know they are there. They live in a communal dwelling that is mostly underground. You might spot a slight leaf covered rise in the earth or what looks like a wisp of fog, but that would be the most. Nor will you see any tracks. They are light on their feet and are conscious not to leave any trace of their presence.
But once you're in their dwelling it is a wonder to behold. It is dry, well lit, and warm. But you wouldn't be looking at that, marvelous as it is. You would be looking at the nymphs going about, naked, often cooking because they love to make food and drink. The drink of choice is usually a hearty ale tasteful and smooth. I have never tasted man made ale that remotely compares.
I need to correct an impression that I might have left. The wood nymphs preffered mode of dress is none. But as a practical matter they often wear aprons for protection. Often I have sat on their couch watching them go about their buisness, bare except for the apron. Yes, the nymphs relish nudity and regard clothing simply as a tool to be used when needed.
I have no idea why they chose me to show themselves to. What they've said to me is that they simply like what I'm about. They had looked at me for a long time as I went about my business around my cabin, and they decided that they would enjoy my stimulation. That might take some explaining. You see there are no male wood nymphs. Apparently the wood nymphs are an evolutionary offshoot from some aincient race. But they do require males for reproduction. It seems that the wood nymph race self-reproduces. Under certain conditions their eggs will divide and a baby female wood nymph will soon be born. The wood nymphs probably wouldn't have approached even me if it weren't for the one thing I can supply that will allow them to reproduce. That thing is stimulation. It seems that their lovemaking with me, or any other male that they choose, releases certain hormones that will then allow their eggs to divide. Then, nine months later, there is a lovely baby girl who will grow up to look much like her mother.
But possibly there is a ray of hope for you blokes in Oz. From my discussions with the wood nymphs I understand that there are similar bands of wood nymphs around the world in various places. As I understand it, because there are some evolutionary changes in the line, due mostly to accidents of DNA, there are small self contained tribes of nymphs in far flung places in the world, usually in remote areas. Because of thei common heritage I'm given to understand that wood nymphs around the world tend to act and think like the ones of my acquaintance.
I haven't pressed the wood nymphs for more information out of respect for their privacy. But the nymphs have confided in me that, since they like me so much, they would like for other bands of wood nymphs to have a similar, what they regard as a treasure.
As near as I can tell there are several high quality men in Oz who are a bit like me. And if the nymphs should see such a similarity they just might approach you like they did me. It will do you no good to look though. But if you strike them as I have inadvertently struck the wood nymphs here, by this message you will know it when you are chosen.
I do have a bit of a warning for you, however. In the remote chance that you are chosen to inspire them for reproduction, you usual productivity will fall to nerly zero. However there is some satisfaction in spending your time and effort stimulating the nymphs to reproduce.
Ken